Madmatics of Life

A great man has said that “the heart must be fooled into thinking that everything is alright “All is well” in order to get the strength to fight tough situations”. OK, Mr. Aamir Khan aka Baba Ranchhoddas Chanchad said it in the movie 3 idiots, which brilliantly shows the pressures one goes through while adulting. It was more like “Aal izz well” and there is one whole song dedicated to this theory. You are singing it in your head already, aren’t you? Isn’t it amazing that bollywood has a song for every mood, every emotion, every person, I often wonder why we don’t have live background music playing as we go about our lives. Well, as I see it this is the “ fighter” way of trying to motivate ourselves to deal with twisted situations we often find ourselves in. Even if for a second, we feel strong enough to handle things without fear. On the other hand, you know what an ostrich does when it finds itself in grave danger? Instead of running away or saving itself, it sticks its head in the...

There are seven sins according to Greek mythology. If you need a poetic refresher on what they are, please listen to “Satrangi Re'' from the movie Dil Se.. Sonu Nigam’s voice, A.R. Rahman’s music, and Gulzar’s lyrics are worth revisiting. While you are at it, don’t you want to watch the Chhaiyya Chhaiyya video just one more time and wonder at its brilliance? Okay, so the bollywood-fanatic in me will move to the side now and let’s talk about why I am starting this article talking about the seven deadly sins. One emotion, which is highly underrated according to me is GUILT. If a person does not feel guilt easily, or is able to move on or let go of things without a second glance, then even the seven deadly sins would not be SINS to him, but just acts. Acts, whose consequences the doer is often indifferent to.  For a person suffering with anxiety, maybe that sounds like the ideal situation, because we FEEL GUILTY FOR ALMOST EVERYTHING!  Sometimes, we end up blaming others for our ...

  They say change is the only constant. Maybe that’s true. But, I have this very strong belief that we all like to have some constants through those changes in life. A mathematical equation often has two parts - the constant and the variable (eg. y=ax+b). Don’t roll your eyes already, I was a maths nerd in school and it’s a core part of my personality. It’s only fair that I have drawn various parallels (yes, like the lines)  between life and mathematics! My point is: we all need some things that are constant to our variable lives so that we can function continuously.  A fact often overlooked by us is that we spend the majority of our life nurturing two aspects of life: (i) our passions , and (ii) our relationships . Sometimes more time is spent on one than the other, and other times it’s the other way round. It often depends from person to person which aspect holds more prominence in their life, or maybe on luck, as to which aspect do people actually get as a relatively c...

I turn around and see a little girl Tormented, confused and alone She wants to scream, loud and clear There are demons she needs to fight She is asking for a helping hand A supportive, non-judgemental voice She is looking for someone reliable Her screams are ignored by many Her hand, outstretched. gets tired of waiting She hears a few voices, low murmurs in her direction Singing songs of lies, betrayal and pessimism She tries to shut them out completely  But they end up controlling her heart Whoever she looks up to with helpless eyes Shows her that she is alone in this war Against the exponentially increasing demons Just then I look into the mirror and shudder The young girl is now looking at me with hope Slowly, she grows up into none other than my own self Now, it hits me, the significance of it all I must be my own savior, I am all I have I just need to extend my hand towards myself Pull myself out of the house of darkness & demons Pull myself into the light and let me be Bl...

“Ignore her crying, she is like that only”, “she is always confused and troubles other people with her dilemmas”, “she seems very rude and clueless”, “she is a very negative person and I cannot have her as a friend”. I have been given all these reasons in the past from people I relied on for abandoning me. Just when I think I can trust someone, they run out of patience and run for their lives like I am Titanic and I will take them into the icy waters with me. You know, if I am to be titanic, all I want is someone to be the band and never give up being with me. After taking around fifty therapy sessions and being on medication for over an year now, a question hit me today as I was driving on the expressway en-route a friend's engagement party.  "Will I ever be anxiety-free?. I think I got my answer today itself. No. It's not a cape, that can be just shed with a little effort to untie the knots. It is in fact, a part of who I am. It's embedded so deep into my personality...

  Life is highly dependent on this thing called “Heart” - both in the biological sense and in the other sense, when we refer to the emotional center of our brain and simply call it “the heart”. People often say things like “listen to your heart”, “home is where the heart is”, “the heart wants what it wants” and many more such phrases. Now when you take these phrases literally, it sets out  funny conversations in our minds. Something that goes like:  Okay, I need to listen to my heart, I am listening but all I can hear is thump thump! I don’t hear an answer to my dilemma. Home is where the heart is, the heart is in my body, so is that my address? Well, it is technically where I live and will continue to live as long as I live. But, I thought home was a place where I felt comfortable and could be myself. Did someone give me the wrong directions?! *opens Google Maps* The heart wants what it wants. Blood? More blood? Fully functioning arteries? A massage?? Yes, they do massa...

What comes to our mind when we hear the word inhibitions - a block, a restraint, suppression of a desire, a hesitation? Agreed. An inhibition is something that pulls you back or that keeps you tied up in your current state. A significant characteristic of “inhibitions” that I have been able to identify is that we have inhibitions about things we really really really want to experience. Then what makes us keep ourselves devoid of that experience? Where do these strong forces originate? Can they be overcome by conscious or subconscious effort?  From what I have observed and learnt in almost three decades of my life - inhibitions can be physical or mental. Physical inhibitions are the visible factors in a person’s life that prevent him or her from moving forward in life such as, lack of resources, a disability or lack of equal opportunity as others, or also the environment in which a person has been brought up in. Mental inhibitions are the invisible factors preventing a person fro...